Kratak vodič kroz svetsku kinematografiju | A Brief Guide: Cinematography 101

8:51:00 PM





Ako niste filmofil i iz bioskopske sale ustajete pre nego što stigne da se upali svetlo, verovatno ne znate ko je reditelj filma kog ste upravo gledali. Budite bez brige, evo kako da prepoznate ko je režirao priču koju ste pratili poslednjih sat - dva… eventualno četiri.
• Ako u njemu glumi Džoni Dep sa belim puderom na licu, to je Tim Barton.
• Ako se u filmu pojavljuju ptice i posle gledanja filma ne smete da odete sami u WC, to je Hičkok.
• Ako se neko probudio sa glavom mrtvog konja u krevetu, to je Kopola.
• Ako Monika Beluči priča na srpskom, to je Kusturica.
• Ako deluje kao da se radnja dešava u američkom stripu i ima krvi do kolena, to je Tarantino.
• Ako se u filmu pojavljuju debeli ljudi koji vrište, to su braća Koen.
• Ako na kadru možete da vežbate zadatke iz simetrije, to je Ves Anderson.
• Ako čujete Stounse ili njujorški akcenat i tu negde se mota Leonardo Dikaprio, to je Skorseze.
• Ako sila bude sa vama, to je Džordž Lukas.
• Ako vas psihopata gleda ispod obrva, spuštene glave, to je Kjubrik.
• Ako su ljudi malo plavlji u licu, to je Džejms Kameron.
• Ako ste pogrešili salu ali dobili film koji ste tražili, to je Dušan Kovačević (hoće centrala da pogreši jednom, ali ne sto puta).
• Ako se glavni junak, verovatno neurotičan, šetka po Parizu ili Barseloni, to je Vudi Alen.
• Ako je film pun bića sa šiljatim ušima koji tragaju za prstenom.. ne, to nisu devojke koje samo hoće da se udaju, to je film Pitera Džeksona.
• Ako se u filmu pojavljuju zgodni Italijani i priča se odigrava tokom ili posle II svetskog rata, to je Felini.
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If you’re not a movie lover and you exit the cinema before the lights go on, you probably don’t know who’s the director of the movie you just watched. Worry not, here’s how you’ll recognize who directed the story you spent one or 2.. maybe 4 hours on.
• If there’s extremely pale Johnny Depp, it’s Tim Burton.
• If there are birds and you’re scared to go to the toilet alone after watching it, it’s Hitchcock.
• If someone woke up with a dead horse’s head in their bed, it’s Coppola.
• If Monica Belucci speaks on Serbian, it’s Emir Kustrica.
• If it looks like you’re inside of an American comic and there’s loads of blood, it’s Tarantino.
• If there are fat people who are screaming, it’s Coen brothers.
• If you can practice symmetry math problems on the movie frame, it’s Wes Anderson.
• If you hear New York accent or the Rolling Stones and there’s Leonardo DiCaprio somewhere there, it’s Scorcese.
• If the force was with you, it’s George Lucas.
• If a psycho was looking at you beneath his eyebrows with his head tilted down, it’s Kubrick.
• If everyone’s faces are kinda blue, it’s James Cameron.
• If the main character, probably a little neurotic, is walking around Paris or Barcelona, it’s Woody Allen.
• If the movie is full of creatures with sharp ears that are searching for a ring.. no, they're not girls desperate to get married, it’s a film of Peter Jackson.
• If there are hot Italians and the story is happening during or after II world war, it’s Federico Fellini.
Feel free to expand the list in the comments below x

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17 comments

  1. Lol...I know almost none of the answers to the questions. I love movies, but I don't think I've ever actually stayed inside a theater until the lights came on. I am usually in a hurry to get the Hell out of there and get some fresh air!

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  2. I love this line: If there’s extremely pale Johnny Depp, it’s Tim Burton. It's so true! :-P x

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  3. Yeah, Guilty! I'm one of those who leave once the movie is over. However, I love checking out IMDB, so there you go. LOL!

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  4. This is awesome! If the force was with you, it’s George Lucas. This one I'm passing along to everyone I know .. made me smile big!

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  5. These are great! I never remember who directed movies but my husband does so that goodness I have him! :) Maybe I will try to remember the above so next time he asks me I might know the answer.

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  6. Lol. These are too accurate. I watch cinema sins and he says stuff like this all the time. I kinda got used to it. Plus I think directors serve more recognition. I guess some people stay behind the screen more often than not.

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    1. I agree, directors definitely deserve more recognition :) They make art, after all

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  7. It's funny how people have their signature things. I knew about a few of them, but never knew there were so many. I'll have to watch out for them

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  8. I love this, it's hilarious and so true! The Tim Burton / Johnny Depp comment is my favourite, that's how I always know his films.

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  9. I had to chuckle upon reading this post! Haha. I don't stay around in a movie theater after the movie is finished. I just want to get out and do some shopping or eat.

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  10. This is so interesting post! Hilarious and very true! Thanks for sharing your thoughts with us!

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